One of the greatest things about marriage is how you can learn from each other. Yesterday my husband Jay unknowingly taught me something that I hope to incorporate more and more into my life.

Story # 1:

Every Friday night we help lead at a youth group, and last night started off with a series of games entitled “Office Olympics.” Jay led an activity where the kids had to rest their head sideways on a piece of paper and trace the outline of their face.

One girl did not join a team and sat alone.  Several times throughout the night I saw Jay pursuing her, trying to get her to participate -  not because the games are that important, but because feeling wanted and included is. Finally the girl gave into Jay’s relentless pursuit, and ended up drawing the best, most detailed picture in the room.

Later I had her in my small group, and she opened up about her life, her hurts, and her struggles.  She had come with the heaviness of the world on her shoulders, and left knowing that at least someone cared to notice her.

Story # 2:

We drove home after youth group that same night, and saw a man in his 30s in a wheel chair wheeling himself along the dark road with no reflectors.  He looked exhausted as he tried to stay off the gravel on the shoulder while maintaining a somewhat safe distance from passing cars.

We drove right by and commented how dangerous it was for him to be on the road in a wheelchair.  After a minute, Jay asked:

“Should we ask him if he needs a ride?”

I immediately responded, “well how would we fit his wheelchair in our car?”  Jay turned the car around and responded, “first we will ask him if he needs help. Then we will figure out how to make it work.”

Bam. I realized he was the one with his priorities straight.

We drove up beside the man and asked if he wanted a lift.  A look of relief washed over his face and he replied that he would love a ride.  And wouldn’t you know it, his wheelchair folded up nicely in our trunk.  Looks like I have a lot to learn.

On the way to his house, we asked him how he had ended up in a wheelchair.  He told us that he had caused a drunk driving accident that killed his girlfriend and baby, and had a court date coming up soon.  He had flown through the windshield, leaving him too injured to get around without a wheelchair.  His weight gain from losing mobility was an added sorrow.

This man was broken, lonely, and living with a mountain of regrets.

We dropped him off and he shook our hands over and over, saying that the world needs more people like us. In my head I thought the world needs more people like Jesus. We departed with a God Bless and the peace of mind that he would not be hit by a car that night.

What did God teach me through Jay last night?  A lesson in dignity. People need to know they are not alone.  People need to know that Jesus loves them. And two people are hopefully closer to Jesus because of my husband’s decision to pursue them.  While I let ‘how’ paralyze me, Jay took initiative and gave the gift of dignity to these two people who needed it.

I love it when my husband looks like Jesus. Thanks for setting an example baby.

Michelle

Two weeks ago Jay and I heard a great message by pastor March Buchanan on Jesus raising Lazarus from the dead (John 11).  Lazarus, along with his sisters Mary and Martha, were close friends of Jesus.  When Lazarus got sick, Jesus remained in another town despite the sisters’ urgent messages that they needed him at once.

Lazarus died.  He had been in the grave for four days before Jesus arrived. Despite this, Jesus requested that the stone covering the grave be pushed aside. Martha (sweetly? boldly? timidly?) suggested this might not be the best idea considering the fact that a four-day old corpse would be somewhat smelly.

They took away the stone.  Then Jesus looked up and said, “Father, I thank you that you have heard me.  I knew that you always hear me, but I said this for the benefit of the people standing here, that they may believe that you sent me.

When he had said this, Jesus called out in a loud voice, “Lazarus, come out!” The dead man came out, his hands and feet wrapped in strips of linen, and cloth around his face.  Jesus said to them, “Take off the grave clothes and let him go.”

Mark pointed out that initially there would have been celebration.  Our dead brother is alive!  Martha, Mary, and their friends would have thrown a big party. But what if they had not removed the grave clothes?  Lazarus would have been walking around, sweating, rotting and festering inside the hot, smelly linens that he could not remove on his own.  Though his friends would have celebrated at first that he was alive, Lazarus would have soon become the topic of hushed gossip. Eventually he would begin to think he was better off dead.

Lazarus smells.  Why doesn’t he do something about that?  We can’t hang around someone like him.  He really needs to get cleaned up.

When someone we know gets saved and finds life in Christ, we initially celebrate with them.  But how often do we then remove their grave clothes? Often we leave these new Christians to fend for themselves and gradually begin to judge them for having hurts, hang-ups, and habits.  I know I am guilty of this.

We as the church need to learn to remove each other’s grave clothes.  Life in Christ should be lived out a safe community where we inspire and equip each other to get rid of baggage from the old life.  If we don’t step up to the plate, we will have wounded, festering, discouraged people leaving the church in search of something better.

What does this look like for you?

Michelle

(Today’s guest post is by my good friend Aaron McCartney)

One of my personal goals is to be a kingdom millionaire. And if it was up to my wife, we’d be kingdom billionaires.  I have stated this before on this very blog. Usually, me and Tabitha end up being the ones to give and be generous.  It really messes me up when the roles get reversed.

For those who don’t know, we found out my wife was pregnant in the month of June, 2010. It was a complete surprise, and the due date was set for February 15th, 2011.

My wife was admitted into McMaster on October 29th at 24 weeks and 3 days gestation because it appeared she had already dihalated to 3cms. Her water wasn’t broken, however, and she was admitted into the hospital on complete bedrest.

Four days later, at 3:04 am on November 2nd, 2010, she had an emergency C-section. Our son Edmund was born at 25 weeks.  This is literally the borderline for life and death.  Anyone born before 24 weeks rarely survive, and if they do there are massive complications with disabilities.

Within two days of life, Edmund was bleeding on both sides of the brain, was hemorrhaging into his lungs, and there was a gap that needed to closed between his lungs and his heart.  His doctor gave him two days to live.

Then, the giving started…
We helped to plant a church a few months earlier called Eucharist Church. When our friends at Eucharist heard about Tabitha going to the hospital, my Blackberry almost exploded!  Phone calls, twitter messages, facebook messages, bbms, texts … everything you could think of. It was absolutely insane. I started hearing stories about churches in Hamilton, London, Toronto, university students in New York, and people in Texas (… Texas?????) praying for Edmund, and for us.

We had people give us meals from Swiss Chalet, parking passes, hospital coffee, and endless amounts of encouragement and support. We had people give us a playpen and a bassonette. A friend of ours gave us $1,000 in cash. Then Eucharist Church gave us a love offering of almost $400.

In our darkest hour, in our greatest need… our church, our friends, our family, and our God stepped up to the table and gave us what we needed, even though we barely asked for anything.

I know it is after Christmas, and you may not think to give now. But think outside the box.  Someone you know has a need.  Even if it looks like they are givers on the outside and they have it all together, there still may be a need. We never asked for money.  We never asked for food or coffee, or parking passes, but people gave anyways.  Don’t ask … just do it.

Where can you give in the month of January to set the tone for the rest of 2011?

Aaron

When I was 20 years old, I experienced heartbreak from an ended relationship and the death of a best friend that followed a few months later.  I was overwhelmed with sadness and hated waking up every day.  It was a dark, dark season.  I felt forgotten and unloved, by God and the people I had lost.

One day I ran out of eye make-up remover, a totally unnecessary and frivolous product that I really did not need to spend money on.  Instead of buying more, I chose to give the money that I would have used away to someone in need, even though everything in me wanted to spend it on myself in an attempt to bring a temporary calm to my tornado of emotions.  Despite feeling forgotten by God I sensed that I needed to obey to the still and quiet voice of the Spirit telling me to sacrifice and trust Him, even in the midst of my pain.

I worked at a doctor’s office at the time, where I booked appointments and helped patients into the examination rooms.  A day after I chose to give away the measly sum I would have spent on make-up remover, I came into the office and found a note on the desk from the other receptionist:

Michelle, a man came in today and told me to give you this as a thank you for getting him in to see the doctor yesterday.

The note was attached to a bottle of eye-make up remover.

My eyes welled up with tears.  What were the chances?  I had not told anyone about my dilemma the day before.  Coincidence?  I chose to think that God was demonstrating his love for me in that moment.  I didn’t need make-up remover. But I did need to know that God had not forgotten about me.

Recently I heard an amazing message by Francis Chan.  It was not one of those clean-cut sermons with three bullet points and a take-away phrase that sticks in your brain.  It didn’t inspire me or make me think, “wow, that guy is a really good public speaker.” But it moved me.  It was like water for my soul. It gave me hope that a spirit-filled life in this day and age is possible.

He told a similar story, about something seemingly silly and insignificant.  He is a pastor of a church in the U.S., and sometimes goes golfing with some friends. (From what I know about Chan’s radical life, this is his only luxury hobby…despite being a millionaire from his recent book, he downsized his home and took several single mothers and people in need to live with them).

For a brief moment he thought how much he would love a new golf driver; the kind his friends all had.  But he dismissed it, knowing that the money could be spent on something so much more important.  He had a speaking engagement the following week, and instead of giving him an honorarium, the hosts gave him a new golf driver. Chan was baffled.

Another story: My sister-in-law collects old National Geographic magazines, and last year for Christmas my mother-in-law, Karen, was looking everywhere for these as a gift for her.  No luck. One day Karen stopped by my work to visit me, and when she got out of the car she saw an abandoned plastic bag sitting in the snow right next to the front tire of her car.  She looked inside and it was a stack of old National Geographic magazines. Karen lived in a different town and knew no one at my work.  Coincidence?

The point here is not that God is a vending machine.  This is not the ‘health and wealth gospel.’  And my heart cries out for the countless men, women, and children on this earth who have real needs that are not being met. Why did this little blessing come to me?  Why did it come to Francis Chan? Or Karen?  I don’t know.  What I do know is that God is a pursuer, and that his Spirit moves as it wishes.  And some stories from Christians in destitute countries are even more miraculous than these ones.

I want my life to be unexplainable, except by the Spirit of God.  I want the church to be so full of radical stories like this, that are only possible because of how big our God is and how desperately dependent we are on Him. I want to witness so many coincidences that they cannot possibly be coincidences. It is truly my heart’s cry.

Do you feel that too?

Listen to Francis Chan’s message here.

Michelle

While at Willowcreek, I got to hang out with 10 Christian leaders, mostly pastors, from Canada. We had a great time.  I don’t think I’d laughed that hard in a year, seriously.

There’s really no decent segue for this, so I’ll just say it: one of them became my current church man crush…

His name is Brad Sumner, and he’s the Sr. Pastor at Jericho Ridge Community Church in Langley, BC.

Planted in 2005, Jericho Ridge has already grown to a few hundred people and a staff of 5.

Brad himself is super sharp. He’s like a mini-Andy Stanley, except not so shy.

Also grinning, always smiling, always asking questions.  He was super engaging… it didn’t matter who you were, you could tell that he genuinely wanted to hear your story and learn from you.

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